..or Adrianne Mole..
i have loads of things going on. Just as i thought i wouldn't be able to pull through, well, everything well that ends well.:o)
Although, it's too early to say, but what better things to do other than pushing hard and being optimistic in time of chaos? I have been managing quite well, and if i keep working hard, everything would be okay.
So, why Adrian Mole? Adrian is a boy who loves to exaggerate almost all aspects of his life. Some find it comical, some ironic. For me, i think that Adrian Mole is an embodiment of naivety-everyone experienced the stage at one point of life.Seriousness that laced with naivety.It is ironic for me because usually what was seen and understood in times of innocence were pretty much the truth.But as we grow up, we tend to disregard what we know/believe because what was realistic in an adult world is different from the younger one.We can't cope with seriousness, therefore we tend to laugh it off and pretend that everything is comical.
Adrian Mole is a suitable theme for my overwhelming feeling of happiness-by which i tend to exaggerate everything i see-in a good way,of course:o)
Oct 31, 2011
Oct 27, 2011
Clamouring
Some things to note...
First thing first, i need to improve my English. in my opinion, it is very shameful to write in bad English, if you are one of the persons teaching it. Supposedly, by now, by any standard, to come out with a well constructed english sentence should be easier than those who are not teaching in this field. Supposedly, we, as the people who had received extensive exposure on the subject should be a master of it. By now, any excuse you give pertaining to your capability is not acceptable. i am in dire needs to improve my english, before it gets even worse. it annoys me so much seeing people who supposedly a master in it(by looking at their academic background) marred it with their own incompetency in using the language. Therefore, i am going to start my improvement process by visiting language site in the net, and by doing exercises on my grammar books. it is always a challenge that can't be refuse.To Improve!
Secondly, i am experiencing the joy of being a woman. i was having a terrible mood swing lately. It started with a very moody feeling before it changed to an unexpectedly happy one. But the worst, my whole body was aching terribly. every inch of my body. i felt like throwing up and mostly sleepy and tired.the lesson from this is: only a girl has the privilege to experience these condition.and it is not easy. While we are at it, bear with it. Embrace it.
Thirdly, a kind of epiphany for me. But i'd rather keep it to myself. all i can say is, i was thinking too much, selfish, jealous and egoistic. i forgot that the smallest things connected the dots sometimes. But i rest my case. I'm happy with what i found.
Fourthly, i am happy for the ability to show true friendship to my friends. I am happy to just be there for him or her.I am happy i am able to express what i feel for them. i honestly love my friends.
I am busy with many commitments, but those commitments also made me happy:o)
First thing first, i need to improve my English. in my opinion, it is very shameful to write in bad English, if you are one of the persons teaching it. Supposedly, by now, by any standard, to come out with a well constructed english sentence should be easier than those who are not teaching in this field. Supposedly, we, as the people who had received extensive exposure on the subject should be a master of it. By now, any excuse you give pertaining to your capability is not acceptable. i am in dire needs to improve my english, before it gets even worse. it annoys me so much seeing people who supposedly a master in it(by looking at their academic background) marred it with their own incompetency in using the language. Therefore, i am going to start my improvement process by visiting language site in the net, and by doing exercises on my grammar books. it is always a challenge that can't be refuse.To Improve!
Secondly, i am experiencing the joy of being a woman. i was having a terrible mood swing lately. It started with a very moody feeling before it changed to an unexpectedly happy one. But the worst, my whole body was aching terribly. every inch of my body. i felt like throwing up and mostly sleepy and tired.the lesson from this is: only a girl has the privilege to experience these condition.and it is not easy. While we are at it, bear with it. Embrace it.
Thirdly, a kind of epiphany for me. But i'd rather keep it to myself. all i can say is, i was thinking too much, selfish, jealous and egoistic. i forgot that the smallest things connected the dots sometimes. But i rest my case. I'm happy with what i found.
Fourthly, i am happy for the ability to show true friendship to my friends. I am happy to just be there for him or her.I am happy i am able to express what i feel for them. i honestly love my friends.
I am busy with many commitments, but those commitments also made me happy:o)
Oct 23, 2011
Stressor
I felt so heavy these few days.
sleeplessness starts to haunt me again.too much thinking.sometimes too much tears.
i can't enjoy myself again. i am having doubts about my feeling again.
i hate it so much.
In life, there will be this one person that will always kill you just by being close to you. and i hate it because he made me cry again, and made me so unhappy.
Why can't you just let me go?
sleeplessness starts to haunt me again.too much thinking.sometimes too much tears.
i can't enjoy myself again. i am having doubts about my feeling again.
i hate it so much.
In life, there will be this one person that will always kill you just by being close to you. and i hate it because he made me cry again, and made me so unhappy.
Why can't you just let me go?
Oct 21, 2011
Reflection
In a long session of updating life..
Somewhat, when you look around, you'll realise what you have been missing.
Somehow, there's every hope in the most dire situation.
sometimes, all you need is a positive attitude, an open mind and a willing heart to understand life.
sometimes, it only takes effort to make everything better again.
Forget the unattainable, don't ponder the future so much, accept the situation at hand and try to make it best for the moment, and just smile at every possibility.
Most of the times, we are hurt by expectation, by memories and by our own set of thinking..
Somewhat, when you look around, you'll realise what you have been missing.
Somehow, there's every hope in the most dire situation.
sometimes, all you need is a positive attitude, an open mind and a willing heart to understand life.
sometimes, it only takes effort to make everything better again.
Forget the unattainable, don't ponder the future so much, accept the situation at hand and try to make it best for the moment, and just smile at every possibility.
Most of the times, we are hurt by expectation, by memories and by our own set of thinking..
Oct 19, 2011
Annoyed
i dont have a very positive mind today.Annoyed for something that is beyond my control.
Today, i went home at about 1645 hours after i completed the tasks that i set myself to do. Out of the blue, i have this feeling of stopping by at Pusat Islam for Asar prayer. i never prayed Asar there unless i wanted to go out with my friend. And then afterward,went to the cafetaria for some kuih for dinner. i've skipped my regular coffee session with my good friend for 2 days already because i had a course.Seriously, that was the worst coffee i have tasted in two days in the course. i need a serious caffeine boost. A good one.
So, in my mind, the image of coffee-hot and fresh after shower would be heaven. But it seemed that today is the day i dreaded. as i finished bathing, the water suddenly turned into mud-oily like color. Very terrible feeling i had.
i was pissed off to read an email in the webmail saying that, it is an un-fixable problem for the time being. Damned it! It has been going on and on, and nobody seemed to be doing anything!For god's sake, no backup plan as well for something that is expected to happen again?!What have you people been doing all these while?
I know that, i am wasting my time getting angry about something that totally out of my control. But those people in control, what are they doing?!Why they didn't think of putting two and two together before they have this noble vision of increasing the population? So much for developing the nation!
Today, i went home at about 1645 hours after i completed the tasks that i set myself to do. Out of the blue, i have this feeling of stopping by at Pusat Islam for Asar prayer. i never prayed Asar there unless i wanted to go out with my friend. And then afterward,went to the cafetaria for some kuih for dinner. i've skipped my regular coffee session with my good friend for 2 days already because i had a course.Seriously, that was the worst coffee i have tasted in two days in the course. i need a serious caffeine boost. A good one.
So, in my mind, the image of coffee-hot and fresh after shower would be heaven. But it seemed that today is the day i dreaded. as i finished bathing, the water suddenly turned into mud-oily like color. Very terrible feeling i had.
i was pissed off to read an email in the webmail saying that, it is an un-fixable problem for the time being. Damned it! It has been going on and on, and nobody seemed to be doing anything!For god's sake, no backup plan as well for something that is expected to happen again?!What have you people been doing all these while?
I know that, i am wasting my time getting angry about something that totally out of my control. But those people in control, what are they doing?!Why they didn't think of putting two and two together before they have this noble vision of increasing the population? So much for developing the nation!
Oct 18, 2011
Sweet Rainy Day :o)
i almost cant believe,
that my dream came true.
with only you, me, the rain and an umbrella.
Life is beautiful. Praise be to Allah.
(^_^)
Oct 16, 2011
Misi diteruskan!
kisahnya: aku sedang belajar setia. hanya kepada dia.
kisahnya: aku berjumpa semula dengan sang kekasih gelap yang tak menganggap diriku sebagai seadanya. kisahnya, pada waktu yang lepas, aku merasa terluka perasaan dan kecewa yang amat kerana aku sangat menyayangi dia, tapi tak boleh menzahirkan dengan kata kata dan tingkah laku. kisahnya, dia lebih menyukai orang lain berbanding aku. dan kisahnya lagi, dia berani meninggalkan aku untuk perempuan-perempuan lain yang lebih menggoda jiwa.kisahnya, saat aku penasaran kerana dirinya, dia menganggap remeh rasaku, dan beranggapan bahawa, aku kan tetap selau untuknya bila dia memerlukan aku.Kisahnya, dia pergi begitu sahaja, tak memandang mataku yang penuh rasa untuknya, dan tanpa mengambil kira hatiku yang pecah berderai, dan tinggalkan aku bermusim-musim lamanya. dan Kisahnya, dia kembali bertanya kasih yang sudah sekian lama dibiarkan sendirian menghadapi hari-hari luka.
kisahnya: aku menemui dia yang membuat hari-hariku lebih gembira. aku menemui dia, yang mengembalikan semangatku ke tempatnya. Aku menemui dia yang membuatku rasa seperti cinta pada pertama kali. kisahnya, dia membuatku percaya diri bahawa, hari-hari adalah hari-hari yang perlu dinanti bersama dia disisi. kisahnya, dia membenarkanku untuk percaya lagi.padanya.pada semua kemungkinan yang ada. pada semua keindahan. dia membuatku terlupa luka di hati, walaupun hatiku hancur kerana masa lalu. dia membuatku sedia untuk memberikan yang terbaik untuknya, menjadi yang terbaik untuknya. Dia membuat hari-hari suram bertukar menjadi warna-warna yang meriangkan. kisahnya, perlahan-lahan, aku jadi suka dia. ingin dia. Kisahnya, aku terlupa akan sang kekasih yang hilang bersama musim.
Kisahnya:bila aku memohon maaf pada sang kekasih yang hilang itu, aku mahu ia berakhir tanpa dendam. tanpa sengketa. tanpa harapan-harapan kosong. Kisahnya bila aku menemui dia, aku hanya ingin memastikan bahawa, aku sudah kebah dari mencntai dia. kisahnya, bila sang kekasih memegang erat tanganku, tiada rasa hati yang terusik. Bila dia melepaskannya kembali, aku jadi tak sampai hati memberitahu bahawa, aku sudah mulai suka dengan someone. hatiku sudah penuh dengan perasaan ku pada someone itu. Kisahnya:bila dia bertanya mengapa ada kedinginan dalam genggaman tangan itu, aku tidak mampu memberi jawab. mungkin kerana mengenangkan perasaan dulu.
kisahnya, aku jadi tak sampai hati. melihat dia menunjukkan rasa kasih, dan perhatian. aku jadi tak berani berbicara dihadapannya tentang orang lain. aku jadi kasihan untuk berterus terang. Kisahnya, aku jadi pura-pura.
Kisahnya, aku gembira kerana aku sudah move on dari dia. aku sudah move on!
Sudah Move On!:o)
kisahnya: aku berjumpa semula dengan sang kekasih gelap yang tak menganggap diriku sebagai seadanya. kisahnya, pada waktu yang lepas, aku merasa terluka perasaan dan kecewa yang amat kerana aku sangat menyayangi dia, tapi tak boleh menzahirkan dengan kata kata dan tingkah laku. kisahnya, dia lebih menyukai orang lain berbanding aku. dan kisahnya lagi, dia berani meninggalkan aku untuk perempuan-perempuan lain yang lebih menggoda jiwa.kisahnya, saat aku penasaran kerana dirinya, dia menganggap remeh rasaku, dan beranggapan bahawa, aku kan tetap selau untuknya bila dia memerlukan aku.Kisahnya, dia pergi begitu sahaja, tak memandang mataku yang penuh rasa untuknya, dan tanpa mengambil kira hatiku yang pecah berderai, dan tinggalkan aku bermusim-musim lamanya. dan Kisahnya, dia kembali bertanya kasih yang sudah sekian lama dibiarkan sendirian menghadapi hari-hari luka.
kisahnya: aku menemui dia yang membuat hari-hariku lebih gembira. aku menemui dia, yang mengembalikan semangatku ke tempatnya. Aku menemui dia yang membuatku rasa seperti cinta pada pertama kali. kisahnya, dia membuatku percaya diri bahawa, hari-hari adalah hari-hari yang perlu dinanti bersama dia disisi. kisahnya, dia membenarkanku untuk percaya lagi.padanya.pada semua kemungkinan yang ada. pada semua keindahan. dia membuatku terlupa luka di hati, walaupun hatiku hancur kerana masa lalu. dia membuatku sedia untuk memberikan yang terbaik untuknya, menjadi yang terbaik untuknya. Dia membuat hari-hari suram bertukar menjadi warna-warna yang meriangkan. kisahnya, perlahan-lahan, aku jadi suka dia. ingin dia. Kisahnya, aku terlupa akan sang kekasih yang hilang bersama musim.
Kisahnya:bila aku memohon maaf pada sang kekasih yang hilang itu, aku mahu ia berakhir tanpa dendam. tanpa sengketa. tanpa harapan-harapan kosong. Kisahnya bila aku menemui dia, aku hanya ingin memastikan bahawa, aku sudah kebah dari mencntai dia. kisahnya, bila sang kekasih memegang erat tanganku, tiada rasa hati yang terusik. Bila dia melepaskannya kembali, aku jadi tak sampai hati memberitahu bahawa, aku sudah mulai suka dengan someone. hatiku sudah penuh dengan perasaan ku pada someone itu. Kisahnya:bila dia bertanya mengapa ada kedinginan dalam genggaman tangan itu, aku tidak mampu memberi jawab. mungkin kerana mengenangkan perasaan dulu.
kisahnya, aku jadi tak sampai hati. melihat dia menunjukkan rasa kasih, dan perhatian. aku jadi tak berani berbicara dihadapannya tentang orang lain. aku jadi kasihan untuk berterus terang. Kisahnya, aku jadi pura-pura.
Kisahnya, aku gembira kerana aku sudah move on dari dia. aku sudah move on!
Sudah Move On!:o)
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