the day i was born

i was born in the early hour of a sunday 26 years ago. My mother said it was a few hours before Subuh.i was very much a cry baby, my mother had to constantly "dukung".I didnt breast fed, so there it was quite a hassle for my parents. I am the first born, so my late grandpa(father's side) and my grandma(mother's side) were trying to get my mother to go back to their respective home. As my grandma(father's side) had passed away years before they were married, so my grandma had the privilege to take my mother home.

But as i grew up, both are my favourite. They are nice people, and i learned a lot of things from them. They love to tell stories-basically stories with moral values. so, i grew up a very much grounded and mature, because of the elderly influence. The funny thing is, my late grandpa used to ask me to hold chicken for him. Sometimes he let me or rather asked me to catch those that got away..Such a fond remembrance. Maybe, he did that because he didnt know any other way to make feel included in his activity. When he was sick, he stayed at our house. he used to smoke his rokok daun after meals, so one day he asked me to buy him a lighter. i forgot-one of the things that i regretted.I was really sad when i remembered that, because he asked for help and i wasnt of much use. i pleaded with my father to go and stayed with him when he was hospitalised, and my father didnt let me because it was school time. When he died, i cried hard.it means that i have no grandpa left as my mother's father passed away while my mother was still in secondary.

My grandma is also a very nice person. When my grandpa(mother's side)passed away, my youngest uncle was still a baby. So she got a menial job with JKR, and only retired while i was in form 3. She never complain about anything, she is always kind to her grandchildren, the wisest person in the world for me. She is the source of my inspiration. One time, when i was off for matriculation, out from home for the first time, we cried together. She was worried of me. So i promised myself that im going to take good care of myself, and going to come back a better person. So many tender moments with her. i am a sucker for kindness, so every little thing she have done moved me tremendously. She is always the motivation for me to keep going on, to keep doing the best for myself and everybody around me. During trouble times, she was there with me, offering support and comfort.Whenever i came back for holiday, the question that she asked me was " will you remember me still when you are away?will you be thinking of me?" and i as usual, cried like mad.I love her so much, and i couldnt think what would it be like when she is no longer there.She offered more than emotional support, she offered financial support as well. i cried easily when im with her, and she will always hug me and said "cengeng". and smile.

There are many good things in my life.Those who never fail to show love and support, those who are the inspiration for me to be better, those who help to show the way around when i feel lost, those who never judge but try to mend, those who pray for me, those wonderful people who show kindness that only God can repay them, those who instil good faith in myself, those people who believe in me no matter what...and finally those few people who make me ponder about life in general, and change me into someone i never thought im capable of being, and those people who make me cry bitterly and make me think that im helpless.

Not to forget those strangers i met, but never get the chance to know each other better-i always meet helpful and kind strangers...

I thank god for every wonderful people in my life, without which i wont know what it would mean to live today.I thank god for all my plans that turn out just they way i wanted them to be. I could never ask for anything better/more.

So, i could never bring myself to say, that i did everything on my own,because there are so many people that shaped me into what i am and who iam today. Which, it is only in God's capacity to repay them back.