Random desire to ramble the titbits...

i love writing so much despite of the fact that i have nothing to write about.

Update, update.

Im going to Santubong this weekend with a group of my lecturer friends. i never in a million years ever imagined that i would climb any mountain. This would be my first. Hopefully everything goes well. we, me and my good friend had started our jogging session since saturday after postponing it several times. My ankle is a little hurt, but i guess in time it would be okay. Ironically, i have been living close to mount kinabalu almost all my life, and the first mountain i climb is mount Santubong?hahaha. Kinabalu is next on the list (probably)hahaha.

My progression has been quite slow with works. but everyday i make sure that at least i tick off one or two things from my list of to do things. i don't want to procrastinate. The more i do, the easier the works are done. i like the feeling of completing tasks. Such satisfaction. i don't really mind the piling works actually. i like the busy-ness. i like that i wake up everyday with something to take care of. Something to do. i also don't like the ideas of leaving any work (should i leave in the future) to be left abandoned. at least, those who succeed me know what to do, which direction to go. So, im trying everyday. To make me feel better actually.

Things are better ( i hope) with my friend. not 100% better, but mending probably. i'm tired of playing mind games. i'm dropping the issues here-which means in the future i would no longer be bothered if or when he is ok or not ok. i'm going to let it be normal. i don't want to read any expression, i don't to read too much into anything, don't want to side him in anything, don't want to show that i care, don't want to have anything to do with him. Just tired of being and trying to be nice. it's breaking my heart to million pieces to care too much about someone who dont understand that i do care. or understand that i care, and dont even give a damned. i'm tired of trying actually, to no good use. So, it has to stop. But my feeling remain. it is true that: he is the nicest guy i've ever known, the one person that i trust and love so much. But life has to go on.

Not much happening today. Quite many moving experience. At least, one and two humbling experience: my boss and my friend. I'll keep them in mind for safekeeping. But,you wouldn't believe how much confidence they gave me.Thank you Allah, for all the goodness of today.