Sadly

sad, demoralised, disappointed, depressed, angry, and truly down.

i just dont know how to live normally.

People are mad mad mad!

i understand the underlying religious principle beneath this, and i'm not rejecting that. But when you go around knocking other people down, talking about what's not your business, then that's paranoid!

1)they sent me an email on dress code etiquette-what to wear(socks, no tight-fitting cloth, no skirts, no shawl because its too short and it show off the chest,etc.)
-this one i accepted it, i even sent home my blouses and put away skirts that can cause people to talk)

2) they sent me an email again, this time about what colour NOT to wear because it might trigger sexual feeling. Now, this one is PLAIN BULLSHIT. And they also mentioned about going out with people whom you are not related by marriage/blood.

3) While i was on duty, people advised me to marry with the guy(s) that i am going out with..or if not do not go out at all with this guy(s)..1)Tak manis..2)Unless u two wanna marry, it is not ok to go out with the guy..

OMG!!!!!!!!!!

i understand perfectly the reason why they raised the issues, but why they bother so much about me?

Everytime they look around, are they looking at my direction first, just to make sure that they dont miss any of my flaws?!

It's not as if i hangout nonstop with male friends. We go out to eat.Day time.In a crowd. Completely innocent friendship. And now, i have to listen to them dictating what i should with my life;like getting married?
What they dont realise is these male friends are the friends that are always there whenever i need help.

Others, who talk a lot, but do nothing-were never there!

or maybe, its me again-i just dont know where the boundary is..

But every time THIS happened, should i go about blaming myself for being different from the rest?