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I can't believe myself today.

i was buying ticket for a vacation when i stumbled into my old diary-the one written sometime in April 2009..and at the end of my reading, i was laughing. harder than i ever did in this recent time..What a full blown sense of humour i had back then. No trace of this negative, sensitive, very tight-faced girl i've become...LOL!!!!

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!

so, i wondered..what have i become?just another bitter individual who doesn't discriminate but hate everything?another round of LOL!!!!

As much as i was laughing hard at some of the stuffs i've written with high level of optimism and zest for life, i also stumbled on one piece of writing about resolution...there were 6 of them.

#Loan buat rumah-Done!
#Driving license-Done!
#Car-Almost!
#House-Done!
#Buy washing machine-Totally Done!
#Lupakan Dia-in progress...

i actually deleted number 6 because everytime i did, the person in question came back again and i couldn't resist the temptation. I wont explain myself on that.it was after all in the past. i did many explanation before.a lost cause anyway.

I can't express how grateful i am for everything that went well.Although i am a little regretful that i have been vain in my way previously. vain being the operative word because i was full of my needs-which was just a small part of the bigger picture, and i failed to look beyond that. Instead i chose to be melancholy and negative about certain events that occurred. i am deeply saddened by that inability. For the first time, i was crying because i'm deeply moved by my discovery. For the first time, im crying because i am happy. Lord, subhanallah Alhamdulliah..

Another piece was a short note written when i watched Igor-It's better to be a good nobody than an evil somebody.....another point to ponder. I hope i didn't lose my good values. simplistic it might be but simplistic is the name of my game.Insya allah.

Another piece was written when an unknown person was smsing me non stop. This person was asking my name which i answered with Ahmad Ahseng bin Abdullah..LOL!!!!!!!! i must be crazy at that time..pure innocence and creatively crazy.LOL!!!!again, where did i lost myself?i wondered...

But then again.What has lost cant never be retained. But it can get better;o)

It can get better!:o)LOL!!!!!!!!