Such words-meant as an encouragement-is a classic case of easy said than done. No matter how much words of encouragement people told you, but if your heart fail to accept it, and the head wont register it in the brain, it would be useless.Very intricate is the thing we call "emotion".
unless and until you want to believe it, you can't pull yourself together.
Once, i was very sad about a person. I liked him, but there were just things that didn't add up. so naturally in the first place, it was disaster. I kept on thinking, and crying, and kept on thinking that the fault was entirely one-sided. i kept on thinking that i was not giving my best, that i was not at my best or simply because i was not attractive enough for him. I kept on blaming myself for everything that has gone wrong in the relationship.
i talked to many people.Not all have worthy opinion.Some would give you direction, which was helping, and some judged your action severely-when all you asked for was ears that listen and understand. But, hey..no big deal. after all, who would want to listen to a never ending story of melancholy?So, in a way, during the earlier phase of the heartbroken experience, i realised that i must know how to cope with my emotional turmoil.
I talked to my mother a lot.i talked to the entire family. Whenever i was sad and depressed, i called and talked to someone, i wrote my feeling, i sang it out, and even i jogged and danced it out. Anything that keeps my mind occupied. Anything that keeps me emotionally healthy. It worked out. I am not the kind of person who just sit around and accepted my condition. i go out and about combating them.
After awhile, i was ok again. The problem was, my heart interest kept on coming into my life. i admit now that it must be my strong feeling for him that kept me glued to my seat for him-even though i never on any occasion blurted out loud that i liked him.But, i guessed he knew it already. If he didn't knew that i like him, he wouldn't dare to hurt me so badly. so i guessed he knew.But then again, hurting me was his game, and i couldn't hold out any longer for bad treatment. my self confidence dropped, i was depressed again, and he got away again scot-free..i was devastated. Much more than i care to admit.
This time around, it was an independent battle. i cried alone in despair, i think a lot-thinking again why would he hurt me the way he did, or how could he?lots of questions, lots of self-analysis,lots of assumption. Still, my mother was always there. Infact, the whole family was there. Giving support, pointing to the humor of it all...
I decided that it was enough for me. everything had to stop. i was crying almost helplessly one day but something my mum said gotten me up again. Something about being tough, and being happy.Something about appreciating my life...
and i know that he is not worth the tears. Maybe,it's the time of his life,when he wants everybody to fancy him, when he needs attention of some sorts and who knows someday when he is older he might understand the weight of what he has done. That, if he thinks anyone else is far more exciting, or easy going, or happy go lucky than i am, then he is free to choose his company.
being me, i am not the kind who stick around at a place i don't belong. I have never been less than the best i can be to people i care about. I guess my best is not good enough for him.Maybe it's just too good to be true for him. But i don't need a person to verify myself. "if you knew that you have done you best, and you knew it in your heart, nothing else matters"-Andrew Matthews
As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt... when yours was broken. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back
Yes, i will be happy for me.
#in response to a post a friend tagged me in Facebook
Apr 28, 2011
Apr 25, 2011
The Art of Driving
Driving is exciting. Once, one of my girlfriends said that, driving is a symbol of confidence, and independence. yes, very much so.It is liberating when you begin to master the skill-from level zero to the next.
However, i am not the kind of person who can pay attention to details. i forgot signs, i forgot that at certain point in the circuit, there is a standing rules. That all the routines in the circuit are the manifestation of rules, regulation, and correct timing and calculation. naturally,i would do it badly. It takes people to say that i'm "bad" at it for me to actually try and master it for good. But when i moved through the phase of ignorance, i did nothing but excellence-i am proud of that!
It teaches me one thing though. No matter how much you want to be indifferent to many aspects in life, you have to always pay attention to details. Details help to organize chaos, to sort out mess, and most of all to do things in orderly manner. In short, it improves our life a great deal better than it used to be.
Now, i am proud to announce that, i am a licensed driver-no longer an F1 amateur a.k.a lunatic driver who drive without an ounce of responsibility in mind:o)
Thank You Ya Allah for this opportunity.:o)
However, i am not the kind of person who can pay attention to details. i forgot signs, i forgot that at certain point in the circuit, there is a standing rules. That all the routines in the circuit are the manifestation of rules, regulation, and correct timing and calculation. naturally,i would do it badly. It takes people to say that i'm "bad" at it for me to actually try and master it for good. But when i moved through the phase of ignorance, i did nothing but excellence-i am proud of that!
It teaches me one thing though. No matter how much you want to be indifferent to many aspects in life, you have to always pay attention to details. Details help to organize chaos, to sort out mess, and most of all to do things in orderly manner. In short, it improves our life a great deal better than it used to be.
Now, i am proud to announce that, i am a licensed driver-no longer an F1 amateur a.k.a lunatic driver who drive without an ounce of responsibility in mind:o)
Thank You Ya Allah for this opportunity.:o)
Apr 24, 2011
My Lost Cause
Boy, was i melancholy!
i was watching The Bounty Hunter, with that hunky Gerard Butler as the front man.
Although, the plot was not quite interesting, i watched through because of Jen Anniston and him.
I didn't actually watch rom-com nowadays for fear that i might traipse emotionally. Infact, i hardly watched any romantic/chic-flick or anything. maybe, i am still very sensitive to the issues or the conflicts presented in those movies. But after awhile, i can handle them already, so i decided to watch. Now, the problem was not the plot. The problem was Gerard Butler himself. He triggered thought.
i ended up crying again for a lost cause.
How appearance is deceptive.
i was watching The Bounty Hunter, with that hunky Gerard Butler as the front man.
Although, the plot was not quite interesting, i watched through because of Jen Anniston and him.
I didn't actually watch rom-com nowadays for fear that i might traipse emotionally. Infact, i hardly watched any romantic/chic-flick or anything. maybe, i am still very sensitive to the issues or the conflicts presented in those movies. But after awhile, i can handle them already, so i decided to watch. Now, the problem was not the plot. The problem was Gerard Butler himself. He triggered thought.
i ended up crying again for a lost cause.
How appearance is deceptive.
Apr 22, 2011
Sajak kecil Tentang Cinta
Mencintai Angin
Harus Menjadi Siul
Mencintai Air
Harus Menjadi Ricik
Mencintai Gunung
Harus Menjadi Terjal
Mencintai Api
Harus Menjadi Jilat
Mencintai Cakrawala
Harus Menebas Jarak
Mencintaimu
Harus Menjadi aku
Nukilan:Sapardi Djoko Damono
Harus Menjadi Siul
Mencintai Air
Harus Menjadi Ricik
Mencintai Gunung
Harus Menjadi Terjal
Mencintai Api
Harus Menjadi Jilat
Mencintai Cakrawala
Harus Menebas Jarak
Mencintaimu
Harus Menjadi aku
Nukilan:Sapardi Djoko Damono
DIAN SASTROWARDOYO - PUISI TENTANG SESEORANG
Puisi asal bertajuk "aku" di komersilkan dlm filem "Ada Apa Dengan Cinta"..
Apr 18, 2011
The Blind Side
Reference:Michael Jerome Oher (born May 28, 1986) is an American football offensive tackle for the Baltimore Ravens of the National Football League. He was drafted by the Ravens in the first round of the 2009 NFL Draft. He played college football at the University of Mississippi for the Ole Miss Rebels. His life through his first year of college is one of the subjects of Michael Lewis's 2006 book, The Blind Side: Evolution of a Game and the subject of the 2009 film The Blind Side...Wikipedia
The Blind Side reminded me of Philippine and someone from my uni year-Dr.Francis Tanglao. Dr. Tanglao was at that time a lecturer at one of uni in the USA. He came from Philippine,and at that time he was promoting his new playwright..so as he told his story, he acted and danced, and everything was stamped in my brain until now. Philippine is famous for its community spirit. Although it is a generally poor country, but the bonding among them has always been the strongest. Dr.Tanglao, in his short but endearing presentation, portrayed Philippine as it is:extremely corrupted, poverty stricken and strong hierarchical practice:society is divided into class ABC(on and on). But he also pointed out one very interesting point:the community spirit based on a very strong religious(Christian) belief:of love, sharing and caring. Infact, in every religion, love and brotherhood are among the fundamental concepts. How much changes and opportunity opened up because of this spirit of love, sharing and caring..I see the same sentiment in The Blind Side-where people in their everyday life met with different individuals. But only a strong feeling of love, sharing and caring can break the boundary to reach out and made the difference. Somehow, your root-how you come about to be that someone you are-can be seen from your action, your values and how you carry yourself. Like Oher, Dr. Tanglao portrayed each and every inch an image of that loving, sharing and caring community spirit.
*Rugby
...is a gentleman's game. It is rough in nature, but those who play the game knew that it is all about tactics and strategies. You can't just be in the position of Offensive Tackle, or be in the position of Line Defense, and be unaffected by the rules and regulation. There will surely be lots of physical contacts:some would bleed, some would broke, but it was never meant to hurt on purpose. That's where the fine line is: to differentiate between a game and a fault. it is the game of self-restraint, of strategic move, of extreme focus and strength. Life itself is like a football game. You may survive against million of odds, but only if you know, what is the purpose, what is your function and are able to adapt to the change in direction of most events that occurred.In the end, like Oher said, the question is whether we are brave enough to dare the chances , and honorable enough to shoulder responsibility that come along, or courageous enough for the challenges..The question that tagged an individual and the whole institution he was made from:the family, friends and the society.
The Blind Side addressed the blind side of the society. Issue that is starring us in the eyes, but no one has anything to say about it. People are segmentized, so much as they said they had moved on from apartheid, or differences in general, they are still pretty much prejudice. Even a study shows that,when given a psychology test, some of the samples unconsciously in their answer associated black with bad . Leigh Anne Touhy, Oher's adoptive mother, was giving the benefit to her doubts when she decided to take Oher under the roof. What Ms.Touhy and her family did was an exemplary behaviour of the famous Christian teaching:Love others like you would love yourself(not quoted verbatim). i remembered, in uni, one of my prof. mentioned, that whenever we perform good deeds, we should never question whether the person at the receiving end is worthy of the good deed. When we perform the deed,our responsibility fulfilled, and the rest is between the receiver and God.
what i like most about The Blind Side is Michael Oher the character. Instead of looking at himself as a victim, he accepted the chances, and turned it into a room for improvement. He didn't play the victim game,he never ask people to treat him differently because of his different experience, neither did he insisted on being overly hung up on his past life. Instead, he moved on, adapted to changes, tried to catch up and appreciated the chances that are given to him.Again, the question of honouring the trust people build up for him. Then there is a question of charity and genuine help. Oher demonstrated a positive characteristic by being able to accept when people wanted to help. Negative people would see it as a charity, feel insulted, and would probably shut the whole world off. and when i look at Oher, the character, i noticed that as much as it was innocence, it was also maturity.
There's so much more-theoretical, technical, idealism, and religious that i can think of when i watched The Blind Side. But the first thing that come to my mind was how grateful i am, for my family and for all the blessings.
He is truly an inspiration
Of feeling
Menghitung hari
Detik demi detik
Masa kunanti apakan ada
Jalan cerita kisah yang panjang
Menghitung hari
Padamkan saja kobar asmaramu
Jika putik itu takkan ada
Yang aku minta tulus hatimu
Bukan puitis
Pergi saja cintamu pergi
Bilang saja pada semua
Biar semua tahu adanya
Diri ku kini sendiri
Oh... Pergi saja cintamu pergi
Bilang saja pada semua
Biar semua tahu adanya
Diri ku kini sendiri
Diri ku kini sendiri...
Detik demi detik
Masa kunanti apakan ada
Jalan cerita kisah yang panjang
Menghitung hari
Padamkan saja kobar asmaramu
Jika putik itu takkan ada
Yang aku minta tulus hatimu
Bukan puitis
Pergi saja cintamu pergi
Bilang saja pada semua
Biar semua tahu adanya
Diri ku kini sendiri
Oh... Pergi saja cintamu pergi
Bilang saja pada semua
Biar semua tahu adanya
Diri ku kini sendiri
Diri ku kini sendiri...
Apr 16, 2011
Election
i was blogwalking when i found this one video when Tun M was giving a speech in one of the campaign.But i'm afraid that it would put me under ISA for its sensitive contents.
i used to love being a politician. having a very strong political background, i was exposed to politic since i was small. Infact all of my lifes, politic was never a strange field. However, as i moved along, i found that not many of my friends are interested in politic. gradually, i too began to lost interest in politic. however, it is still one of my interests among others.
It was very sad to note that someone who was once "the apple of the eye" of most people, now has turned to be a freak show. He keep on spinning in the name of justice and rights.After the locked up, he grew so bitter, that he makes everyone his enemy.But it is impossible for wrong to be right, or to correct a mistake by making another one. In the end, what he had successfully achieved is creating a vicious cycle that goes on and on. The things that people do for power!
i used to be a big fan. i still admire his public speaking skills.His choice of words, his style, and everything about him. But as Tun M said, he turned out to be someone we cant count on. To quote him directly: standing next to him pun takut, apa lagi membelakang...Joke aside, How can we let someone who can't even be responsible for his action to be responsible about others?How can we let him take care of something as precious as a country?
i also watched the video in which a former assistant did the oath of innocence against him..When he mentioned the details of his action, it was so revolting that i stopped listening all together. I personally am not sure what Sumpah mubahalah means. According to the explanation in the video, it is an oath of innocence done when you are innocent and people wouldn't believe your innocence. The oath is done in God's name.What a bold act to do.Astaghfirullalazim.
probably the video:the PR is beginning to see him as a liability, and they are trying to get rid of him for good. So the best plan is to come out with a disgraceful sex video.What else could be the explanation?Those who came up with the video were few of his close assistants.
What a wasted talent, and quite a story it would be in history.
nevertheless, the government won the state election:55-16.
i used to love being a politician. having a very strong political background, i was exposed to politic since i was small. Infact all of my lifes, politic was never a strange field. However, as i moved along, i found that not many of my friends are interested in politic. gradually, i too began to lost interest in politic. however, it is still one of my interests among others.
It was very sad to note that someone who was once "the apple of the eye" of most people, now has turned to be a freak show. He keep on spinning in the name of justice and rights.After the locked up, he grew so bitter, that he makes everyone his enemy.But it is impossible for wrong to be right, or to correct a mistake by making another one. In the end, what he had successfully achieved is creating a vicious cycle that goes on and on. The things that people do for power!
i used to be a big fan. i still admire his public speaking skills.His choice of words, his style, and everything about him. But as Tun M said, he turned out to be someone we cant count on. To quote him directly: standing next to him pun takut, apa lagi membelakang...Joke aside, How can we let someone who can't even be responsible for his action to be responsible about others?How can we let him take care of something as precious as a country?
i also watched the video in which a former assistant did the oath of innocence against him..When he mentioned the details of his action, it was so revolting that i stopped listening all together. I personally am not sure what Sumpah mubahalah means. According to the explanation in the video, it is an oath of innocence done when you are innocent and people wouldn't believe your innocence. The oath is done in God's name.What a bold act to do.Astaghfirullalazim.
probably the video:the PR is beginning to see him as a liability, and they are trying to get rid of him for good. So the best plan is to come out with a disgraceful sex video.What else could be the explanation?Those who came up with the video were few of his close assistants.
What a wasted talent, and quite a story it would be in history.
nevertheless, the government won the state election:55-16.
Apr 15, 2011
can't be serious??
as many things are completed, many new things started.
The atmosphere is tensed and highly explosive.
My group in Kamsis changed from group 8 to 1..again. So far, i have been relocated 3 times. Last night i'm on duty. And tonight im up again, because of that middle-of-the-month reshuffle.I started to have a bad feeling when the TKF called to inform that i would be on duty again tonight. She said that, she and the KF had decided to relocate me to group 8. She was asking whether i would have any objection..Oh, i thought the question came before they made it official and published it in the web-mail.And had i objected, would it be of any use?Obviously not.and the bad feeling came with the question: why every time they reshuffle, everybody else stay in their own group and i to another? My ready answer: i am lesser complication, unlike other people who would kicked and screamed..
While on the way to some place today, a person was talking about my x-bestmate. How he was this and that. My first impression was, she mentioned him all too many times in our conversation. In fact the whole conversation was about him. She was talking specifically about his uncooperative-ness, but i wondered why she would talked about him to me. She knew well, that in the first place he is a taboo..Funny:o).
But, i was glad i didn't react or overreact. As she mentioned his flaws all through the conversation, i made a point to comment on our job specification. Nothing personal. I don't trust her. She was saying this and that to me about him, but when i saw her talking to him, none of the things she said materialized. I hope i had made an impression already. i wont be dragged into a conversation badmouthing him, or praising him. Neutral is my stand, TQVM. And she in the first place shouldn't think that just because we have started conversing again, that everything can be carried off from where we left of. Not anytime soon.
i feel that there is something amiss somewhere. But i can't figure out what, or why. I dont want to ask question because im afraid that people might say that im paranoid. But there is certainly a bad vibe everywhere, and it disturbed my inner peace. I wonder what could other people knew that i don't know?
In each and every prayers, i pray to Allah to guide me through difficult time, and to make the burden of responsibility be bearable, and to protect me from something i have no knowledge about. I pray for His Mercy to keep me going strong. He knows best.
The atmosphere is tensed and highly explosive.
My group in Kamsis changed from group 8 to 1..again. So far, i have been relocated 3 times. Last night i'm on duty. And tonight im up again, because of that middle-of-the-month reshuffle.I started to have a bad feeling when the TKF called to inform that i would be on duty again tonight. She said that, she and the KF had decided to relocate me to group 8. She was asking whether i would have any objection..Oh, i thought the question came before they made it official and published it in the web-mail.And had i objected, would it be of any use?Obviously not.and the bad feeling came with the question: why every time they reshuffle, everybody else stay in their own group and i to another? My ready answer: i am lesser complication, unlike other people who would kicked and screamed..
While on the way to some place today, a person was talking about my x-bestmate. How he was this and that. My first impression was, she mentioned him all too many times in our conversation. In fact the whole conversation was about him. She was talking specifically about his uncooperative-ness, but i wondered why she would talked about him to me. She knew well, that in the first place he is a taboo..Funny:o).
But, i was glad i didn't react or overreact. As she mentioned his flaws all through the conversation, i made a point to comment on our job specification. Nothing personal. I don't trust her. She was saying this and that to me about him, but when i saw her talking to him, none of the things she said materialized. I hope i had made an impression already. i wont be dragged into a conversation badmouthing him, or praising him. Neutral is my stand, TQVM. And she in the first place shouldn't think that just because we have started conversing again, that everything can be carried off from where we left of. Not anytime soon.
i feel that there is something amiss somewhere. But i can't figure out what, or why. I dont want to ask question because im afraid that people might say that im paranoid. But there is certainly a bad vibe everywhere, and it disturbed my inner peace. I wonder what could other people knew that i don't know?
In each and every prayers, i pray to Allah to guide me through difficult time, and to make the burden of responsibility be bearable, and to protect me from something i have no knowledge about. I pray for His Mercy to keep me going strong. He knows best.
Apr 14, 2011
Praise be..
* ALLAH KEEPS ME GOING *
Happiness keeps you sweet, trials keep you strong, sorrows keep you human, failures keep you humble, success keep you glowing, but only Allah keeps you going!
Praise be to Him, the Almighty.
Happiness keeps you sweet, trials keep you strong, sorrows keep you human, failures keep you humble, success keep you glowing, but only Allah keeps you going!
Praise be to Him, the Almighty.
Apr 13, 2011
It's only words
When i got the memo for Non Conformance Report, i thought it was going to be technical through and through. Little did i expect that i would like the course much more than i thought. i love the terms the facilitator used all throughout the course: precision, conciseness, and apple for apple.
The things that i like about the facilitator was because he was able to use appropriate and varied vocabulary in conversing his ideas, he was able to explain a technical terms in a very lay-men way- which showed off his language ability. I also like the fact that he is very technical, practical and logical about everything.No hanky panky. Now, this is the effect of being the examiner for speaking test, you are more aware of people choice of words.
i like it because it was philosophical in manner.
On another note, i am still busy with work related thing..and supposedly i shouldn't bothered about things of lesser importance. But, i'd say..What the heck?!
As long as you are able to keep tab on everything, and as long as everything is in order, why put your life on hold? The important thing is to set the priority, which one is which..
I love the game of chaos-once you master the skill to run it, nothing else matter.Nothing. This would be an interesting new challenge to overcome. Running your life in Chaos-Ville..
I am very thankful for my KJ today for taking one big responsibility from my shoulder. Despite my so called superwoman-boast(rolled eyes), i cant possibly do a single thing without other people helping me.. And that was a generous helping, dear Boss..hehehe
And life is good, i got everything i need.Alhamdulillah:o)
The things that i like about the facilitator was because he was able to use appropriate and varied vocabulary in conversing his ideas, he was able to explain a technical terms in a very lay-men way- which showed off his language ability. I also like the fact that he is very technical, practical and logical about everything.No hanky panky. Now, this is the effect of being the examiner for speaking test, you are more aware of people choice of words.
i like it because it was philosophical in manner.
On another note, i am still busy with work related thing..and supposedly i shouldn't bothered about things of lesser importance. But, i'd say..What the heck?!
As long as you are able to keep tab on everything, and as long as everything is in order, why put your life on hold? The important thing is to set the priority, which one is which..
I love the game of chaos-once you master the skill to run it, nothing else matter.Nothing. This would be an interesting new challenge to overcome. Running your life in Chaos-Ville..
I am very thankful for my KJ today for taking one big responsibility from my shoulder. Despite my so called superwoman-boast(rolled eyes), i cant possibly do a single thing without other people helping me.. And that was a generous helping, dear Boss..hehehe
And life is good, i got everything i need.Alhamdulillah:o)
Apr 11, 2011
Low Millions - Eleanor
Eleanor, i missed you,
Eleanor, Be Well
Eleanor i wish you'd
Release me from this spell...
Apr 9, 2011
Weird. Weirdo. Weirdos
Taking a break from my current obsession(tangan kedada mata keatas)..hehehe
Out of the blue, i checked my long neglected Friendster account where there was one new friend request.A guy from Kapit who wishes to find his soulmate from the net.Weird. When i approved him, i thought it was my cousin of the same name. But later on, when i checked my friend profile, i found out that he was not. So i checked out his profile, only to find out that his interest are relationship, and he wishes to find someone for life partner...THAT scares the hell out of me. i decided to NOT do anything more than accepted his friend request. I am so very much NOT a relationship material. So if i dont want any other unnecessary development, better keep it cool as cucumber;o)..hahahhahaha.totally out of context.
Yesterday, i went out jogging with one of my male friend. As we jogged along, and as we approached the sport center, one person stopped in front of me and my friend. He clearly pointed out the fact that he disapproved of us jogging together, and that if it were the students, he would've do something...which i was not really listening to because, i am confused and embarrassed at the same time..The funny thing was, before he walked away, he said:main-main je..
Okay, fine...
First of all, he stopped in front of us and started to comment on us jogging together.
Second of all, after he walked away, some of the male staffs, who were sitting at the lobby of the sport center were all watching with interest, and afterward one of them started to ehem..ehem.. and called my name..i dont know whether he called my name/informed his other friends of who i was..
i felt so embarrassed. i felt like i was caught naked-TOTALLY AT THE WRONG SIDE OF THE LANE!
Now, i wonder which parts of his action was main-main?
looks like i have to get ready with what may come next.People may gossip, let them.
People may say anything, let them. I might have to listen to some people talk about that to me, so be it.
So probably now, some of them might know me as the girl who always seen with her male friends..So what?Bring it on.
So now, i might have a new reputation...Like i care. Biar saja.Weirdos
Well, some people just dont know when to keep their mouth shut. I won't let them dictate what i should do with my life.
My aim is to be the best i could be to those who matter.and NOTHING beside that,matters.
Out of the blue, i checked my long neglected Friendster account where there was one new friend request.A guy from Kapit who wishes to find his soulmate from the net.Weird. When i approved him, i thought it was my cousin of the same name. But later on, when i checked my friend profile, i found out that he was not. So i checked out his profile, only to find out that his interest are relationship, and he wishes to find someone for life partner...THAT scares the hell out of me. i decided to NOT do anything more than accepted his friend request. I am so very much NOT a relationship material. So if i dont want any other unnecessary development, better keep it cool as cucumber;o)..hahahhahaha.totally out of context.
Yesterday, i went out jogging with one of my male friend. As we jogged along, and as we approached the sport center, one person stopped in front of me and my friend. He clearly pointed out the fact that he disapproved of us jogging together, and that if it were the students, he would've do something...which i was not really listening to because, i am confused and embarrassed at the same time..The funny thing was, before he walked away, he said:main-main je..
Okay, fine...
First of all, he stopped in front of us and started to comment on us jogging together.
Second of all, after he walked away, some of the male staffs, who were sitting at the lobby of the sport center were all watching with interest, and afterward one of them started to ehem..ehem.. and called my name..i dont know whether he called my name/informed his other friends of who i was..
i felt so embarrassed. i felt like i was caught naked-TOTALLY AT THE WRONG SIDE OF THE LANE!
Now, i wonder which parts of his action was main-main?
looks like i have to get ready with what may come next.People may gossip, let them.
People may say anything, let them. I might have to listen to some people talk about that to me, so be it.
So probably now, some of them might know me as the girl who always seen with her male friends..So what?Bring it on.
So now, i might have a new reputation...Like i care. Biar saja.Weirdos
Well, some people just dont know when to keep their mouth shut. I won't let them dictate what i should do with my life.
My aim is to be the best i could be to those who matter.and NOTHING beside that,matters.
Apr 8, 2011
Mixed Reaction
Today is the threshold to infinity!:o)
Although, there are many things to complete, i would like to announce that my Saturday and Sunday are Commitment-free hehehehehe
My plan is an easy breazy one. Tonight, i would start my final test marking, while watching Maharaja Lawak. i would sort of camp in front of the TV. Tomorrow morning, i would look at my other task while taking care of the household chores. The funny thing is, i am afraid that i am just gonna look but wont do anything...;o)
These few days i am busy with work-related thingy. i changed my driving class schedule to Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday because im tired to be referred as the "not okay" one all the times. It works wonder when my driving improve a great deal. i am the examiner for a public examination starting Monday this week until the mid-week and continue until Monday next week-which means, there are many things to take care of, marks to be submitted and report to be written. And i have own things to do at the office-a power point presentation to do for a meeting. i also joined two extra programs-judge for choir competition and participant for the Orienteering Race...
So, i think i am quite busy, and most probably be tired at the end of the day, but i refuse to whine and complaint about it.Besides, everyone is tired and busy, everyone experienced the same thing, so why whine about it as if everyone else is just not doing anything?
many good things happened these lately. and i don't know what triggers it. But, again, why question a good thing when it happens?the least we can do is to accept it with open arms.One of it is: im up for the driving test on 27 of April..Yes!!!!
At least, life is working out just fine
Thank you ya Allah, for the wisdom to understand and for things to change direction in the most unexpected way. Thank you for the blessing, Verily in You we put our complete trust..amin
Although, there are many things to complete, i would like to announce that my Saturday and Sunday are Commitment-free hehehehehe
My plan is an easy breazy one. Tonight, i would start my final test marking, while watching Maharaja Lawak. i would sort of camp in front of the TV. Tomorrow morning, i would look at my other task while taking care of the household chores. The funny thing is, i am afraid that i am just gonna look but wont do anything...;o)
These few days i am busy with work-related thingy. i changed my driving class schedule to Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday because im tired to be referred as the "not okay" one all the times. It works wonder when my driving improve a great deal. i am the examiner for a public examination starting Monday this week until the mid-week and continue until Monday next week-which means, there are many things to take care of, marks to be submitted and report to be written. And i have own things to do at the office-a power point presentation to do for a meeting. i also joined two extra programs-judge for choir competition and participant for the Orienteering Race...
So, i think i am quite busy, and most probably be tired at the end of the day, but i refuse to whine and complaint about it.Besides, everyone is tired and busy, everyone experienced the same thing, so why whine about it as if everyone else is just not doing anything?
many good things happened these lately. and i don't know what triggers it. But, again, why question a good thing when it happens?the least we can do is to accept it with open arms.One of it is: im up for the driving test on 27 of April..Yes!!!!
At least, life is working out just fine
Thank you ya Allah, for the wisdom to understand and for things to change direction in the most unexpected way. Thank you for the blessing, Verily in You we put our complete trust..amin
Apr 3, 2011
What Hurts the Most
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then
And just let them out
I'm not afraid to cry
Every once in a while even though goin' on
With you gone still upsets me
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