Jagalah Diri

-Am listenig to a song by Jaclyn Victor "Jagalah diri".  i  always  love with this song. Maybe because it is a song from a person to the Almighty. penuh pengharapan, puitis dan menyentuh hati yang paling dalam.


-  Do you realise that  the reason we love certain things is because it reminds us of something?A symbolic? 

- i think Edry Abdul Halim is supertalented. i wonder why nobody ever let him win any AJL's award or AIM  etc. Powerful words there. Pray for Edry. Thank you Edry.

A Reflection: We were eating and discussing  human nature in the office pantry today, when a kakak referred to recent incident threw a question: Mengapa orang yang attitude tak bagus, menyusahkan orang, tak buat kerja selalu dapat apa yang dia nak, sedangkan orang yang baik-baik, tak menyusahkan, dan suka menolong tu selalu tak dapat apa yang dia nak? kalau dapat pun pelbagai halangan yang kena dilalui?


Here's what the ustaz said:


وَعَسَى أَنْ تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ خَيْرٌ لَكُمْ وَعَسَى أَنْ تُحِبُّوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ شَرٌّ لَكُمْ وَاللهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنْتُمْ لاَ تَعْلَمُونَ
“Boleh jadi kamu membenci sesuatu, padahal ia amat baik bagimu, dan boleh jadi (pula) kamu menyukai sesuatu, padahal ia amat buruk bagimu; Allah mengetahui, sedangkan kamu tidak mengetahui.” (Al-Baqarah: 216)


And it is good enough an answer for me. Indeed, a perfect answer.

Of downhearted

I dont know how to write about negative feeling. i cant make it sound right.

I was quite downhearted these past few months because I didn't get the promotion. After years of spending my life building a career, it was quite a disappointment to not get it. I think anyone in my shoes would feel the same. I am not the type who play around during work. I give full focus. I did everything that was required of me. Not only because it was my duty, but working is a passion. I love what i do. when i didn't get it, it took some times for me to come back to life. With renewed conviction to be even better. i don't want anybody to sympathise. I knew my potential. at least i understand that it wasn't caused by my lack of competency for the works that i do. Rather, it was because, i think, of human evaluation. Human evaluation is rather relative. what looks good in your eyes, might not even reach other people' s standard. So, i move on with a little reservation in my heart. 

But then again, as a Muslim we believe that nothing in this world is relative. Allah knows best. We plan, and His planning is bigger than human's planning. Wisdom learned. Perhaps it was Allah's way of keeping us grounded. Kita rasa kita kerja habis baik sudah tapi mungkin belum deserving of promotion. Kasi kemas sikit lagi. Tiada yang terjadi sia-sia. That thought comforted me.

However, i thanked everyone unwavering support and words of encouragement. Something that i didn't particularly know how to express or accept. something to learn: being expressive. Humanity is what keeps you sane.

I will try again. But for now i am going to be sad for a while. :)